Intellectual Conversations
There was someone I used to have long intellectual conversations with about politics, religion, finance, convenience stores (don’t ask), fashion, food, movies, tv shows, and so much more. That person is no longer in my life and I kind of miss and crave the all-nighters we used to have just talking our ears off.
It’s funny because I’m usually not a chatterbox in the real world. When in big crowds, I’m quiet and keep to myself for the most part. I’m better one on one, but even with that, I need to feel comfortable around the person. So for me to crave conversation, is an unusual occurrence. I’m craving those conversations.
Conversations in Second Life are different for me. I don’t like talking about heavy things online or getting into heated discussions. There are really only a handful of people I chat with regularly about topics more than just pixels. I know in essence SL is just one big chatroom itself, but I never really was able to open up to more than a few people on here. It may be a trust issue because when chatting I like to look into the other person’s eyes. Usually the eyes tell a lot more about what a person is thinking or feeling than the lips do.
Where are you most chatty? In the real world or in SL?
When I first got this retro space set from The Secret Store, I started thinking of cool locations or processes in Photoshop I can use to do some interesting spacey images but then I attached this adorable little alien and decided to keep it simple with him. I loved the way his big, inquisitive eyes looked up at me and I just felt it was the perfect moment to take the snapshot. If you want one of your own, head down to Arcade now.
Credits:
*Mesh Head: Slink Visage Mesh Head – Emma by Siddean Munro
*Skin: Glam Affair Slink Visage Applier by Aida Ewing
Hair: tram D602 hair / cork by Moca Loup
*Outfit: The Secret Store – Retro Space Set by Maylee Oh (@ Arcade)
Little Alien: The Secret Store – Retro Space Set by Maylee Oh (@ Arcade)
Pose: It’s part of my AO from Vista Animations
I talk more in SL because my friends here tend to be female whereas we menfolk just stand around and grunt in RL. Plus I can call that one friend of mine a skank and she can’t slap me.
One of my fav pics from you. I like it simple and i think sl people are very changed now, not like it used to be some years ago. Most people keep skype, rl facebook and other networks to comunicate with the sl friends and its almost a requirement for them. It kinda brakes all the magic for me. I miss when we were just naive and nice playing sl. So i used to chat a lot more in sl than now. Im very chatty in rl.
Mr. Jefferson: LOL you’re the only one I let call me a skank. <3
Sofia, yes I have noticed that as well. I actually don't mind skype as much but sometimes it is just easier typing. I hate keeping my headset on for long periods of time.
I’m a lot more chatty in SL, but I’m slowly gaining the confidence to be a bit chatty and outgoing in my RL, thanks to this place. <3
Much chattier in world. Not just sl though, other online ways as well, but sl is great as it’s also the environment to chat. I have great memories of not only the late night long chats (when the sun comes up >.<) but also the sims where the avis stood or sat, it's cool how that is part of the memory too. There are some great people in sl, so it's fun to see their take on things 🙂 . In rl I'm really shy, just like you said though I and better one on one. I find there are a lot of similar people this way in sl, which makes connecting easier and thus chatting easier as well. Oh, and I learn things! Recent discussion on politics made me see a whole new side of a story 🙂
If you ever need a Spacey kind of surrounding here’s a place to go http://maps.secondlife.com/secondlife/Moonbase/132/130/48 its a kind of space station on the moon.
And i think im about equally chatty/Shy in both SL & RL, depends on who it is and what situation.
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When it comes to discussing heavy issues I really don’t mind big audiences or strangers; the more the merrier, diversity of opinions is actually preferrable, and lack of non-verbal cues shouldn’t be an issue because, frankly, if someone’s trying to convince you that the Earth is flat, being sold by a smile or a wink only proves personal gullibility, not a fault in the discussion setup. The only problem with such wide-open discussions is the increased probability of someone’s poor civility (either unintentional, with too opinionated persons, or intentional -a troll-) poisoning the debate. But that’s life, and a good opportunity to develop a thicker skin.
As for personal issues, there isn’t that much that I’d rather keep private; discussion of feelings and personal history is fair game for me, a good exercise in openness and sincerity, and it also facilitates friendship: people won’t trust you or open up to you if all they see is a consumate “talk-nice-say-nothing” politician’s façade.
I’m a garrulous sod no matter where I am, but I tend to chat more in real life for two reasons. Firstly, I can talk much more quickly than I can type; although I’m a fast typist anyway my fingers just can’t keep up with my brain some of the time. And, secondly, when I’m logged into SL these days I’m usually there for a reason, so I’m less likely to engage in a long conversation with anyone.
Gone are the days when I used to log in early and stay inworld for hours not doing anything (unless Daros is inworld, in which case I do still log in and we’ll stay there for hours while we’re together. One or other of us might go off to do something in RL but we’ll stay inworld together). I think a comfortable silence is the most telling pointer of a very close friendship: nobody feels the need to talk, to fill the silences.
I’m in agreement with Sofia about the FB/Skype thing to communicate with people in SL. While it suits some (the ‘Facebook Generation’ who are happy to link SL with RL) I steer clear of that, outside of having a dedicated email for Skell. I’ll share certain things about my RL (for example, I’ve mentioned – albeit vaguely – on my blog the job sector that I work in) but I maintain a distance between SL and RL. If someone in SL starts asking me personal RL questions then I usually close up and turn the conversation to something else. I like to choose what I share and when/where I share it, and if I get even the remotest hint that someone is being pushy with RL, that’s when I start edging away.
A good friend once said to me that, if you let a person talk for long enough you’ll know their inner self (the bit that’s most worth knowing) anyway, so there’s no need for prying questions. Sadly, the patience to do that seems lacking in many people these days, and they just charge in with the A/S/L stuff. A shame, because SL offers us all the chance to present that inner, worth-knowing self to the world, and riding roughshod over that with demands to know RL details is disrespectful to the person behind the avatar. Not only that, it also denies (generic) you the chance to know the truest part of them.
Clearly I have a lot to say on this. I should take it to my own blog 😉
My tendencies to chat varies not on medium but rather on the relationship. I’m a talker, too much I often think, and can go on and on about a pet topic. I worry I bore people, though, especially since my topics of interest these days tend to be psychology and politics, neither of which are particularly restful.
i yap about the same amount (way too much) in both. but because my RL is now quite empty people-wise really i talk more in SL. i think about the differences quite a bit though. a couple things have always been rather striking. i am more careful with conversations in SL partly due to the lack of eye contact thing, never sure what impact my words might have, so i am more polite and kinder i think. also text gives that much much much needed second sober thought, so now instead of blurting out whatever first smart ass thing came to mind, i can type and delete. really i PREFER talking in SL, and i think it has made me better ‘at it’.
and sorry this is days late, some weeks just don’t leave room for email lol
I just realized that I think the place I yap the most is on my blog lol. Thanks you guys for all the comments. <3
Finely, a friend and I bought the space retro suit you have in photo above, it was a Gacha moment of shopping.
Happy Holidays,
caramia